February 2012
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scientist: the average person spends 18 hours online per week.
me: you mean per day
scientist: what
me: what
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wow im so stupid i accidentally texted my dean and i was like “stop rubbing it in bitch” omfg why don’t i check who i’m texting before i send the god damn message
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Person: Have you seen this movie?
Tumblr: No, what's it about?
Person: Well there's these two guys--
Tumblr: They're gay for each other.
Person: No... they have a strong relationship but--
Tumblr: Gay.
Person: They're both happily--
Tumblr: Gay.
Person: You haven't even se--
Tumblr: Two dudes. Gay.
Person: Can I--
Tumblr: I just wrote the fic, bro.
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unfreshing:
There’s literally no way to tell how many chameleons are in your house
paddlethrutheclouds asked: idk if i've asked you this before but why did you go to boarding school omg
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Anonymous asked: What is it like to go to boarding school
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whenever someone pulls me out of the crowd like at a magician show or something they’ll ask my name and i’ll say aly and they’ll say something like “oh bob? okay cool so..” WHY CAN’T YOU JUST UNDERSTAND ME AND MY NAME
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cjacqueline:
That moment when you finish a book, look around, and realize that everyone is just carrying on with their lives as though you didn’t just experience emotional trauma at the hands of a paperback.
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me with friends: hey this would make a good text post
me giving birth: hey this would make a good text post
me being murdered: hey this would make a good text post
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